Using the language of the Spiritual Exercises of St Ignatius of Loyola, Fr Raf’s life and ministry as a Jesuit priest was centered on the work of consolation expressed through prayer, presence and purpose.
prayer
The Spiritual Exercises enlist various methods of prayer in the search for God’s will. Fr Raf was an effective mentor not only on fostering a life of prayer through the Spiritual Exercises (retreats) but also in promoting materials for prayer by publishing a number of books on the subject.
I was a college freshman at Xavier University, Cagayan de Oro, 46 years ago in 1979 when Fr Raf asked me to collaborate with him in publishing his first book on prayer entitled: My Personal Response: Prayers for Students. He published seven more prayer books, some translated from Spanish and others as a compilation of works. One of his published prayer books which reflected his concluding years in the Jesuit Health and Wellness Center was Abiding Presence for Golden and Twilight Years written with Maribi Garcia.
Fr Raf found it consoling to be assigned in retreat ministry for a total of 14 years, first in the Jesuit Retreat House in Cebu for six years, and then in the Jesuit Retreat House in Malaybalay for eight years. He followed with great interest the recent renovations and the re-development of our retreat houses in the Province. In particular, he asked his family members to support the re-development of the Jesuit Retreat House in Banawa Hills, Cebu, which was established in 1963 on property that was purchased from the donated funds of his parents: Judge Fortunato Borromeo and Doña Mercedes Neri.
Underlining the primacy of prayer, Fr Raf shared during his 92nd birthday Mass last 18 February 2023: “As elderly Jesuits, our main obligation is prayer, prayer especially for the Church and the Society of Jesus. We have a Community Mass every evening. It is my joy to be the celebrant every Tuesday. I also keep daily vigil before the Blessed Sacrament, an hour in the morning and an hour in the afternoon. Every Sunday I have a Facebook Live Mass at ten o’ clock for those who cannot go to church, here and abroad.”
presence
In 2019, Fr Raf published his memoirs as a Jesuit entitled Remembering at Eighty-Eight. The book opened with the quote: “Memory is the sacrament of God’s presence.” In remembering, Fr Raf shared the gift of God’s presence with his beloved family, his fellow Jesuit companions, and his ministry of accompaniment with others.
Fr Raf was happy to mention the growth of the Borromeo-Neri Clan by 2023 to 237 members in five generations, namely, the “Goldies,” the “Yuppies”, the “Puppies”, the Guppies” and the youngest generation which was still searching for a name.
Underlining “memory as the sacrament of God’s presence”, Fr Raf loved to share his own vocation story and his formation experiences as a Jesuit with other companions from his novitiate days, ordination batch, Jesuit companions during his active ministries, and his later life with fellow community members at the Jesuit Health and Wellness Center.
purpose
Included in his book Remembering at Eighty-Eight were a collection of short essays on various topics. I felt consoled to read the essay “How’s Your Life” which was an edited version of one of the reading materials he gave to students when he was Student Affairs Director for 23 years at Xavier University.
To emphasize purpose in student formation, Fr Raf introduced the Christian Leadership Seminar for leaders of student organizations at Xavier University. As one of the participants of this leadership seminars, I learned to interact with other leaders which deepened our Christian commitment and service to others.
As a Jesuit priest, Fr Raf kept the clarity of his vocational purpose and remained faithful even as he faced the difficult trials of his illness. He openly shared in his book and to others the most serious and painful trial of his life and how he was healed from emotional depression, as if waking from a bad dream. His courage, patience and humility reminds us of St Paul’s words: “For when I am weak, then I am strong” (2Cor 12:10).
Thus, Fr Raf’s ministry of consolation expressed in prayer, presence and purpose defined his deep faith in the Resurrection of our Lord. Unlike Thomas in the gospel who did not believe the news of the Risen Lord unless he saw the nailmarks in Jesus’ hands, put his finger into them, and put his hand into Jesus’ side, Fr Raf leads us to faith beyond physical evidence.
Some may have wondered why the coffin containing the remains of Fr Raf remained closed since the start of our wake. It was his personal wish not to expose his dead body to viewers. To quote his words: “Put me in a simple, inexpensive coffin, and keep it closed during the Funeral Mass and Wake. I want to be remembered, not as a corpse but as a living person, fully alive…I think we have to adjust our views about death and dying, if we believe in the Resurrection and Life Everlasting. Maybe there should be less of sorrow, and more of hope, even joyful expectation, when we think of the dead and of our own death. Why, it is the only door that leads to full life eternal. ‘No eye has seen, nor ear heard, nor has it entered the mind of man, what the Father has prepared for those who love Him.’
In an email dated 9 April 2021 at the height of the COVID pandemic, Fr Raf sent me the following message: “Last Saturday I woke up sobbing. The nurse and caregivers came in to see what was wrong. But all I could tell them was: JOY! JOY! REJOICE! REJOICE! HE IS RISEN! HE IS RISEN!”
Fr Raf, as we bid you goodbye on this earth, we exclaim with you as you finally encounter our Risen Lord: “JOY! JOY! REJOICE! REJOICE! HE IS RISEN! HE IS RISEN!” Amen.